Saturday, June 15, 2013

No More Yelling ~ An Update

It's been one week.

I've had plenty of opportunities to yell, but I haven't taken them.

Well, not all of them.

I almost wrecked the other day.  After the scare and slamming on my breaks I sort of raised my voice to one of my boys in the backseat.  It was my worst slip up so far.  I have apologized.  The boy I apologized to said, "Aww Mom, that was nothing."  Unfortunately he's heard worse.

A couple of nights ago I went into my son's room and found clean laundry I had given him to put away, on the floor.  In a semi-loud voice I called his name.  "You're not going to yell at him are you?" my husband said.  I didn't.

I gave a little schoolwork lecture the other night.  One that I've given 100 times before.  I didn't yell.  It was a miracle.

So...all in all I'm doing a lot better.  The above really is an improvement.  I had almost gotten to the point that I was yelling every single day, and sometimes several times in the same day.  Not. good.

I will be checking in periodically with an update, but here's what I've learned so far:

  • Internal issues affect external behavior.  This sentence comes from my dear sister and it's total truth.So many times when I yell there is something else going on inside of me that makes the goofing-off-in-the-kitchen-that-leads-to-a-spilled-jug-of-milk seem so much worse.

  • I'm not alone.  I have received many texts and emails this week.  I could never have imagined! Whatever your struggle, don't struggle in silence.  Christian sisters can do a lot for each other if we are willing to put ourselves out there. 

  • My kids are WAY happier and talk to me a lot more about their lives when I'm not mad.  My moody child has been in a marvelous mood all week.  I asked him if he thought he was in a good mood because I hadn't been yelling.  He said, "YES".

  • Parenting boys is different than parenting girls.  Parenting teens is different than parenting small children.  Parenting in a large family is different than parenting in a smaller one.  It is a complete waste of time to compare yourself to others.  I can say without hesitation, if you don't have a home full of boys who are teenage and tweenage, just don't.  {PSA - Unless you've been there, done that...please don't say been there, done that.}

  • And one more thing, Satan is slick, but he's not all that.  Our God is way bigger!



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